Momentum For Monday, March 3rd 2025

“But beyond this, my son, be warned: the writing of many books is endless, and excessive study is wearying to the body.” (Ecclesiastes 12:12)

I'll try to keep it honest with you without sounding whiny here. I work full-time, but I started doing grad school full-time since last October. Going into it, I knew it would be temporary, yet intense, so I just tried to keep perspective while grinding it out. 

Slowly I started noticing the stress and busy-ness impact my health. Again, I thought I could just plow through it since it was only temporary. Things eventually got worse. What I needed to remember was that I’ve been dragging out school for years so I can work full-time and it’s taken a toll. I've never been a picture of perfect health by any means, and others have it so much worse, but things started to change, and not for the good. Still, I kept pushing. "It's only temporary. It will slow down in March," is what I kept telling myself and I still am as I write this.

Everything started to get impacted. My heart. My mind. My health. My attitude. I am burnt out like I've never experienced.

During a class for school, I was doing homework when I came across the above verse in Ecclesiastes. I knew it was God speaking to my heart. Yes, my studies matter, but I'm out of balance. As much as I didn't want to hear it, I was happy to see God interjecting. It means he sees my struggle and knows what's going on. 

So, yesterday I had all day for homework to finally wrap up some classes. I sat down to work on them and I knew I had nothing in my tank to get it done. I closed my laptop and went and took a nap. I felt guilty, but I had to force myself to leave it be. I had to do something I needed instead of what I wanted.

Sometimes doing what's right feels strange. Being healthy may need to be forced. Wisdom may look like the exact opposite of your intuition. The very thing needed could come at the expense of personal ambitions. I only share this because maybe I'm not the only one that needs to surrender personal agendas and trust in the care and wisdom of God?

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.”

(Proverbs 3:5-6)